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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the mud and crosses back over? A dirty double crosser."

"I used to think the brain was the most important organ Then I thought, look what's telling me that."

"Who always wins the insect election? The lesser of two weevils."

"If you complain about not being able to find your boyfriends name on a keychain that store will think you have a boyfriend"

"[I just barely squeeze thru the elevator doors as they shut, however my chain wallet get caught, ripping my pants off as the elevator rises]"

"The FDA is banning trans fats because they're bad for you... but OJ has actually killed people!"

"I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus. Then he put a black rubber ball in her mouth with a strap around her head I'm just telling you what I saw"

"I just got unfollowed by a woman that just started following me yesterday, so I guess I just had my first one night stand on twitter."

"Albert Bandura can anyone tell me the joke about bandura with a chicken and the egg. something about realizing that the environment came first"

"My parenting book would be just a series of ""Shhh"" with different lengths and punctuation for various occasions."