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Joke of the Day
"I want to see an episode of Intervention where the person is addicted to Nutella."
Next Joke
"What do bulimic stone masons do? Binge and parge."
"Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work..."
"Me: ""Hey towel, you're looking good. What u doing later?"" Wife: That's not what I meant by pick up my towel. Just hand it to me, idiot."
"Stomach: I'm hungry. Brain: Chill out, dude, she's in a meeting. Stomach: I WILL NOW DEMONSTRATE A WHALE'S MATING CALL."
"I don't know what it means to ""find your better half"" but I hope my better half is a robot so that I can be half human half robot."
"An attractive woman at a bar orders a double entendre. The bartender gives it to her."
"What's the rudest kind of elf? A go fuck yours-elf"
"How many dubstep fans does it take to clean a shower? 100. 1 to actually clean the shower, and 99 to stand around and talk about how filthy it is."
"So they say rubbing the Buddha statue's belly gives you good luck... ...imagine if you sucked his dick."