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Joke of the Day

"Jesus Sure jesus fed 2000 people with fish, but hitler made 6million jews toast."

"""Doctor, I have an embarrassing medical problem..."" NSFW Well, what is it?"" asks the doctor. ""I have five penises."" ""Five penises!,"" exclaims the doctor, ""How does your underwear fit?"" ""Like a glove!"""

"It's weird to think there was a time when the most data a tablet could hold was five commandments."

"What type of missiles were used in the Movie Top Gun? ""Tom"" Cruise Missiles."

"I successfully said ""Worcestershire sauce"" today!"

"I had a piece of Carefree sugarless gum ..and I was still worried! It never kicked in!"

"What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine? You can throw your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you around for two weeks afterward"

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? THAT'S NOT FUNNY!!"

"Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is play dumb."

"I stopped fighting my inner demons; We're totes BFFs now."