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Joke of the Day

"Witches these days have it so easy. Do you know how hard it used to be to find so many newts? Now you get them with free 2 day shipping."

"Whats a butt's favorite exercise? High Knees"

"joke what did the porcupine say the first time it had sex ? ouch ooh ouch ooh ouch ooh. what the beaver say the first time it had sex ?....... gee Wally that kind of hurt"

"[maid of honor speech] Never thought this day would come! Remember when you came home early & he was wearing your bra & panties [mom faints]"

"Did you hear about the vampire who had an eye for the ladies? He used to keep it in his back pocket."

"How many Hippies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Hippies don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in dirty sleeping bags in the woods."

"Do you know what Minnesota doesn't have? Super Bowl Babies."

"Funny prank: Put a cinder block in someone's pillowcase and right when they say ""What the fuck?!"" let like six wolves into their room."

"What's the difference between a hockey team and a New Jersey hooker? A hockey team showers after 3 periods."

"My daughter wants a smart car for her 16th birthday. She thinks it will do her geometry homework."