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Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't NASA send cows to space? Because the stakes would be too high."

"Life is like a dick pic... Sometimes you get things you don't ask for."

"How do Australians ask their friends to pass the Coffee Mate :("

"I met this guy who said he was a Mir space station Engineer. But I thought it was quite an achievement."

"The worst thing you could hear after orally pleasing Willie Nelson. I'm not Willie Nelson."

"NASCAR is a visualization of how women argue. They keep going in circles. And I sit through both things with the same hope: If I wait long enough, maybe they will crash and burn."

"Cop: ""Sir, what's in the bottle next to you? Me: ""It's water"" Cop: ""Sir, this is wine"" Me: ""What? Jesus! He did it again!"""

"I bought a backpack that was field tested... ...They didn't say anything about how well it performed on the test, but I was glad that they showed some initiative."

"A far right party wins an election in Germany with 60% of the vote. I did nazi that coming"

"Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? Because he wanted to... ""Get along little doggy"""