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Joke of the Day

"I could tell you a joke about TCP.... But I'd have to keep repeating it until you got it."

"I was out of tanning oil once, so I used PAM Cooking Spray. The tan didn't stick."

"Did you hear about the man who fell into the upholstery machine? He's all right, now. In fact, he's fully recovered."

"I'm not saying I'm a jinx But the first time I played Tetris the first thing that dropped for me was a circle"

"What is the last thing a redneck says before he dies? ya'll watch this!"

"What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs"

"I am sad I can no longer get Arnold Palmer's at restaurants anymore But it looks like I can get an Arnold Embalmer now."

"I bet you the first person to invent puzzles was a woman that ripped up a picture of her husband."

"Q: What goes VROOM SCREECHVROOM SCREECHVROOM SCREECH? A: A blonde going through a flashing red light."

"me: What? A lot of people launch shopping carts across parking lots wife: Yeah but they take the kid out first! son *screaming*"