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Joke of the Day

"[restaurant] DATE: Tell me something naughty about you ME: Sure [loudly chewing a steak] I haven't brought any money"

"""Honey the baby is crowning!"" *Lifts up hospital gown* ""Well excuse me YOUR MAJESTY!"""

"I have never managed to find a happy medium All the one's I've ever met have a haunted look to them."

"Why was the electoral map feeling down? It wasn't, it was feeling blue."

"My Favorite Fairy Tale The dog who cried woof"

"Kenny G walks into an elevator and says ""Man, this place is HAPPENING!"""

"Two Yogurts walk into a bar... The bartender says ""hey! What do you think you're doing?! You can't be in here!"" The yogurts respond, ""why? We're two cultured individuals."""

"I have two personal trainers... One on each foot!"

"Why don't black pitchers throw three strikeout in a row? Because they don't believe in the KKK"

"9*picking his nose* wife:Get your finger out of your nose! me [alone in the bedroom] *takes finger out of nose* *whispers* How did she know?"