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Joke of the Day

"I have enough money to last me for the rest of my life... Unless, of course, I want to buy something."

"Jared Fogle isn't happy with his prison sentence. He requested a transfer to juvenile prison."

"What is long and hard that women don't have compulsorily? The military service."

"believe that the members of the dental profession are the only men who can tell a women to open or close her mouth and get away with it."

"How did the T-Rex feel after his workout session? He felt dinosore."

"There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who divide everybody into two kinds of people, and those who don't."

"What does a gentleman do after sex? He puts the diaper back on."

"Why was Santa sacked two days before Christmas? Elf and safety"

"Somebody told me I was condescending today. Since you probably don't know what that means, its when you talk down to people."

"If you put 30 female Apes and 30 male Apes in a bedroom what do you have? A very large bedroom."