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Joke of the Day

"Well, well, well. I guess my silver letter opener isn't so ""gaudy"" now that there's a rampaging werewolf in the house, is it, Gladys?"

"My girlfriend left a note on the fridge door... It said, ""this is not working. I'm going to my mothers."" I opened the door. The light came on. The beer was cold. Just what in the hell did she mean?"

"""Risky Star"" What kind of a star can be risky? . . A shooting star!"

"What do you give a sick bird ? Tweetment !"

"What is the opposite of Christopher reeves? Christopher Walken"

"I used to have S.I.D.S now I have PTSD :("

"I went clubbing last night I saw girls twerking in a bun dance."

"What is the difference between walking a dog in America and China? The spelling."

"If Russia attacked Turkey from the rear... Would Greece Help?"

"Q: What do you get when you cross a Pentium PC with a research grant? A: A mad scientist."