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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend left a note on the fridge door... It said, ""this is not working. I'm going to my mothers."" I opened the door. The light came on. The beer was cold. Just what in the hell did she mean?"

Next Joke
 
"What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Dogs don't lick jam... just kidding... they do ;)"
"A guy walks into a bar with a duck on his head... the bartender said, ""Can I help you?"" and the duck said, ""Yeah, get this guy off my ass."""
"[SPOILER] Who is going to die in the new Star Wars? Some Stormtrooper"
"One ant was running across an unopened box of crackers and urging another to speed up. ""But why do we have to hurry?"" said one. ""Can you read you nut! It says Tear along the dotted line'""."
"They played The Shins while I was in Whole Foods today and I leveled up in Caucasian."
"Sorry, page 2 of Google searches."
"What will Russians be cooking for Thanksgiving...? Turkey"
"Once I threw a Boomerang but it didn't come back Now I live in fear"
"What do Swimming and Masturbation have in common? You have to get through a lot of fluid to find the perfect stroke."