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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a turtle without its shell? Dead."

"For my SysAdmins and DBA's: Why did Hitler secretly want to work on MySQL? .. just so he could rewrite my.cnf"

"Today, I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a wall... ...As he turned and sneered at me, I thought: 'that's a little condescending'."

"I failed my chemistry lab exam. I was in the middle of performing a chemical reaction but I got sued by the Fine Bros."

"One day the mailman is going to murder my whole family and my dog will be like ""Ha. Who needs to quit yapping and go lay down now?"""

"I was disappointed to learn Flickr is not a site about female masturbation."

"What was a positive accomplishments made by the Nazi party? The leader killed Hitler OP: http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/3grkqb/what_were_some_positive_accomplishments_made_by/"

"Why did the toad become a lighthouse keeper? He had his own frog-horn."

"Medical fact: If a woman drinks two glasses of wine a day it increases the chance of a stroke. If you let her finish the bottle she'll probably suck it as well!"

"Food critics have it easy... everything is handed to them on a silver platter."