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Joke of the Day

"A cop pulled over a spanish photon... The cop asked, ""Do you know how fast you were going?"" The photon said, ""c."""

"What do you call iron man and silver surfer when they work together? Alloys."

"My wife gave birth to twin boys the other day. And I've decided to name them Jerry and Forgery."

"What's the worst thing about a blowjob from an anorexic girl? They never swallow."

"What's the difference between Martin Luther King Jr. Day and St. Patricks Day? Everyone want to be Irish on St. Patricks Day."

"Yesterday, I lost a wedding cake.. ..but today, I fondant."

"I hate weddings, funerals and the symphony. I never know when to clap."

"So the other day i saw a beaver begging by the side d the river But I didn't give a dam"

"Why did the man angrily throw out his alarm clock this morning? Because it reminded him of Jonathan Clock the man who raped his wife the night before."

"Financial status: 10 days ago: eating cat food. Today: eating the cat."