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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a bottle of glue in a spy's pocket? A bonding agent."
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"When your prospective father-in-law asks:""Why do you ask for my daughters hand in marriage?"" Do NOT say:""Because I am tired of using my own"""
"What do you call heavy metal music written about fruit? Applecore. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"A little boy came running into the kitchen. 'Dad dad' he said 'there's a monster at the door with a really ugly face' 'Tell him you've already got one' said his father !"
"What do you do if you fiend King Kong in the kitchen? Just don't monkey with him."
"I'm busy hiding all of the tissues in my house... So when Santa comes tonight he will have to use his beard"
"Someone at the men's outfitter just called me 'MISS' on the phone... ... ehh at least I don't sound married!"
"What do you call a man who makes fart scented candles? Incense-itive"
"Don't you hate it when your girlfriend asks you to go deeper and you ran out of poems?"
"Me: Thank you! Cashier: You have a good one! Me: That's the rumor! Cashier: ..."