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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear some expert thieves stole the toilets from the police station? The police were left with nothing to go on."

"A classic from my grandfather. How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it. How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way. Unique up on it."

"What do you call a teacher who doesn't fart in public? A private tooter!"

"What do you call a pissed-off Founding Father? A Cranky-Doodle-Dandy!"

"Is it solipsistic in here? Or is it just me?"

"Women would be better serial killers if they didn't smile when people mention someone's been missing"

"*Becomes a black hole* *Only absorbs corndogs*"

"""God is dead"" - Nietzsche ""Nietzsche is dead"" - God ""I'd like to add you to my professional network"" - LinkedIn"

"Why did the blonde have bruises on her belly button? Blond guys aren't too smart either."

"it's very distracting hearing your girlfriend being mauled by a tiger as you try to read ""big cat owners monthly""."