91995

Joke of the Day

"Why is Joey Tribbiani a presenter on the new Top Gear? It doesn't make sense, he and all his friends are always stuck in second gear"

"I like my cream like I like my slaves. Whipped"

"""haha this costume party is great"" ""sir PLEASE get off the table"" ""cool librarian costume"" *sprays silly string* ""hey dude nice police costu"

"FUCK YEAH I GOT A CRIMINAL RECORD *smooth criminal blasts an i bust out sick mj moves* ""congrats sir u are now manager of this kfc/taco bell"

"If you cross a telephone and a lobster what will you get? Snappy talk."

"How do you comfort a grammar nazi? ""There, they're, their."""

"Me: Mmm...I love your milky white skin. Him: Ma'am are you registered for this class? Me: Yes Him: Step away from the CPR doll and sit down."

"If you're having second thoughts, you're two ahead of most people."

"They cloned a man without his permission. Was he angry? He was just beside himself."

"How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb? Fruit salad"