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Joke of the Day

"They cloned a man without his permission. Was he angry? He was just beside himself."

"Why roboticize vacuuming? It's all instant gratification. It's the crack of cleaning."

"How is a speech impediment like a box of chocolates? It doesn't really matter, as long as it has good cocoa content."

"Slaves be like ""Oh, you worked four years for your Bachelors?"" I worked 50 for my Masters"

"I'm not saying she's a whore... But if you threw her out a window she'd be deep penetrated[.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defenestration)"

"Why do women only use putters while playing golf? Because women can't drive."

"I don't want to be racist.... so stop trying to make me to take up competitive running!"

"How is having sex with a woman and eating at KFC similar? After you're done with the juicy breasts and the tender thighs, all there's left to do is to throw the bone in the greasy box."

"Q: How many bassoonists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Only one but they'll insist on going through about 5 bulbs before they find one that suits this particular room and situation."

"I yelled ""shotgun"", long before anyone else, but I still got to sit in the backseat. I hate cops."