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Joke of the Day

"A man shows up to his psychiatrist completely naked but covered with saran wrap... Psychiatrist says, ""I can clearly see you're nuts!"""

"What do you call a bear with no hair? Bare"

"Friend nagged me for TDKR OST. Renamed Backstreet Boys song and mailed them to him. Fun."

"Safety first. Just kidding, coffee first. Safety's like third or fourth."

"What did the eggs say when the cops showed up? Everybody scramble!"

"A termite walks into a bar And asks ,"" Is the bar tender here?"

"[TRYING TO IMPRESS NEW GIRLFRIEND] 'Oh yeah, I love to cook!' *removes salad from the microwave"

"""Doesn't it feel good to Payless?"" no, i want to be rich & shop at good stores"

"So my friend told me I don't understand the meaning of irony... It was ironic because I was sitting on a park bench."

"A pregnant pause is like a regular pause but it doesn't have a period."