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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a gay guy scream twice in one evening? Fist fuck him then wipe your hands on his drapes."

"Yes, I said I was sorry and that I'd do anything to win you back. But that was before you told me you needed a ride to the airport at 5am."

"Figure skating is so gay. That's it, Olympics, I'm switching over to Project Runway."

"Two books arm wrestle. One ruptures is appendix, the other helps him rebind it."

"Avocados by Dre. $79.99 each."

"*Buys map of world, pins up on wall *Throws dart, swears to visit wherever it lands *packs for wall 3 feet away *has an amazing time at wall"

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? It's a really obscure number. You've probably never heard of it."

"Do you know why the Little Mermaid wears seashells? Because A and B shells were too small"

"I like my women like I like my wine.. 12 years old and locked up in a cellar."

"Pakistan launches a rocket to Moon. Pakistani News channel reports: ""Water and fishes found on Moon."" BBC reports: ""Pakistani satellite found in Arab sea."""