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Joke of the Day

"A priest, a rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The bartender says, ""What is this, some kind of joke?"""

"Yo mama's so fat she's half Indian, half Irish, and half American."

"Women seem to want security. At least that's what they yell whenever I approach them."

"What is a parrot? A wordy birdy!"

"drummer: ""just add er on the end of your instrument"" guy who plays trumpet: ""so im a trumpeter, ok cool"" guy who plays trombone: ""oh no"""

"[x-post from askreddit] Aside from throwing stones, what should a person living in a glass house not do?"

"Back in my day, I used to have to walk 4 miles to the nearest store. Because I had too many DUIs."

"Why do elephants do well in school ? Because they have a lot of grey matter !"

"if evolution isnt real then sombody please explain how my couch has ""evolved"" to fit the shape of my butte"

"The doctor thinks I need a penis reduction I asked him if it could wait until after my golf tournament."