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Joke of the Day

"BAGPIPE VS. ONION Q: What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion? A: No one cries when you cut up a bagpipe."

"What does a French beaver call her home? (From my 8 year old) Madame"

"Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week what have you got to say about that? Pupil: Thank heavens it's Friday !"

"How to make friends: Put your clothes on backwards so people don't notice you walking up to them."

"""Cu Later!"" - a guy who wants some Copper, but not right now."

"""No one cares about the jews"" ""Yeah, they do"" ""No they don't. During the holocaust i killed 3 jews and one clown"" ""Why one clown?"" ""See? No one cares about the jews"""

"Supposedly Adam Ant has been trying to impress Robert Plant for years... ...everyone knows Adam Ant doesn't move Robert Plant, but he's got high hopes."

"Whenever I have sex with my girlfriend, I let out loud, deep breaths. I used to feel embarrassed about it, but she told me that sighs doesn't matter."

"The problem with millennials is they were taught to look up to Pokemon not *struggles to think of a thing old people respect* Mussolini"

"Two elephants and a snake jumped off a cliff... Boom Boom Tsss"