91004

Joke of the Day

"Why are most rappers afraid of vending machines? Because eminem's in there (Sorry, it works better when it's spoken)"

"[META] banned phrase suggestion Can we get an auto removal / deletion on any joke that has ""sorry"" at the end? Nothing kills a joke for me like having someone apologize for it."

"Mary had a little lamb. ...and she was delicious!"

"What do David Carradine and the Mets have in common? They both choke when it really matters."

"I saw Death walking out of my house today... I guess Grandma won. Again."

"What did Keanu Reeves say to slow down his horse? Whoa."

"Robin Williams tried to give me a high-five the other day but I just left him hanging"

"What country does every one called Andy come from? Peru, because it's the home of the Andes!"

"What's the best thing about having sexy with twenty one year olds? There's twenty of 'em. edit: autocorrect is a bitch - we all know what it should say."

"What do you call a stolen Tesla Car? Edison."