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Joke of the Day

"I'm pretty excited about my new band When I asked the record exec whether he thought our song would be popular, he told me it would be off the charts!"

"What do you call a Phillipino contortions? A manilla folder"

"What did the hat say to the scarf? You hang around here while I go on ahead."

"Pretty sure nobody would run marathons if they were never allowed to talk about running marathons."

"My Valentine is like the square root of -100... A 10, but imaginary"

"I asked for a ham and swiss, you gave me a meatball instead Woops, wrong sub."

"Leaving church just now, the priest shakes my hand and says ""Love your neighbor"" I said ""Me too Father, she's got some tits, huh!??"""

"What is a chemist's favourite restaurant? Rubidium's."

"how does a moel make his money? he collects the tips."

"Greatest Fears: -Sharks -Ebola -Bears -Bear Sharks -Bear Sharks with Ebola -Sharks with Lazers -Man carrying a clipboard on the sidewalks"