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Joke of the Day

"I'm pretty excited about my new band When I asked the record exec whether he thought our song would be popular, he told me it would be off the charts!"

"Girls vs Guys How come that when a women sleeps with a bunch of guys, she is considered a slut but when a man does it, he is considered gay?"

"The home cooked pizza box says to cook the pizza between 14 and 16 minutes. That's 15 minutes, right? I'm not reading too much into it?"

"*wife comes out in a robe* I'm hiding your present Yes it's wrapped Nooo, it's not in the fridge [5 minutes later] IT'S NOT IN THE FRIDGE!"

"A baseball walks into Wimbledon. The announcer yells ""Hey, we don't serve your kind"""

"I'm okay with most drugs... But cocaine is where a draw the line."

"How many frat brahs does it take to screw in a light bulb? None- it's already lit, fam"

"What's the difference between Bill Clinton and Santa? Santa stops at 3 'Ho's'"

"I asked my priest which musical instruments he plays. ""Mostly just piano,"" he replied, ""but when I'm at work I sometimes dabble with a little organ."""

"What's the temperature inside a tauntaun? Luke warm."