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Joke of the Day

"The fact that there is even such a thing as ugly hookers tells you pretty much all you need to know about men..."

Next Joke
 
"*wears reindeer antlers* *innocently smiles* *bats eyelashes* *steals your wallet*"
"friend: here he comes. dont set him off again. me: ok me&friend: hey JADEN SMITH: What If We Are the Hay, And The World Is Harvesting Us?"
"[making small talk at a business function] ""You're 35 aren't you?"" ""No, I'm 38"" ""Oh right"" [long silence] ""Did you used to be 35?"""
"I keep trying to make funny eye puns... But my friends say they keep getting cornea and cornea."
"Comas make a big difference in a sentence. For example: Ben is in a hurry. Ben is in a coma."
"ELMO WANT BIG HUG!!! ELMO WANT KIDS TO KNOW THAT JET FUEL COULDN'T POSSIBLY MELT STRUCTURAL STEEL"
"I asked this vampire to think quietly about what he'd done but then I remembered they can't reflect."
"What's the difference between me and a cardboard box? A cardboard box isn't always empty on the inside. :("
"I run a support group for sex addicts They're all in the other room sitting in a circle... OH MY GOD"