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Joke of the Day

"What's the procrastinator's favorite song? ""Tooomorrow, tomorrow, I love yah, tomorrow.."" (You're always a day away)"

"Why did the walrus go to the Tupperware store? He was looking for a tight seal."

"if u think ur house is haunted get a cat. whooshing sound? it's the cat. hear footsteps? def the cat. unseen being devouring your soul? cat."

"Why did the frog cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken"

"Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, was quite skinny, and apparently had bad breath. That'd make him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis"

"My boyfriend offered to do analingus if I'd trim a ""landing strip..."" I told him he should be more worried about Skid Row."

"Hey did you see the one about the blind guy Yeah neither did he"

"What do you call a surgeon who graduated last in his class? Doctor"

"Why does camping never get boring? Because it's in tents."

"I have a friend named Dick... He's mentally richarded."