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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't the scientist find salt for his breakfast? Because it was Na HA! Get it? Because Na=sodium and N/A=not available. Seriously, this is good clean fun."

"What do you call salesman with a lisp? Rodger. He's the one with the lisp, not you, so why would you call him anything different?"

"""We don't serve faster than light neutrinos in here"", said the bartender. A neutrino walks into a bar."

"How did Harry Potter get down the hill? He walked . . . . . . . . . . . . . J.K..................... Rowling"

"When people tell me I'm intimidating, I generally just glare at them until they take it back."

"I'm so sorry my pet rock attacked you. Its just he really hates arrogant douche bags. Thank god he only hit your face."

"Let me tell you about the first time I had sex... I was scared, it was dark, and I was alone."

"The egyptian man wouldnt admit he'd fallen in a river I guess he was in de Nile"

"I always thought by 2013 we would have flying cars. Instead, we have blankets with sleeves."

"On your first day as a new parent, walk up to your baby and cry louder than it to assert your dominance."