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Joke of the Day

"Two psychics pass each other in the street.. One says to the other: ""You're doing fine. How am I?"""

"What do you call a skydiving tonsil who's afraid that something bad might happen? Paranoid!"

"If I had a cool name like AL Gore, I would make horror films."

"The entire history of the universe could be seen as a slow growth, expansion and coalescence of consciousness, were it not for Sarah Palin."

"It's surprising how little people change Actually the process isn't that different, other than the tiny clothes"

"I hate when I'm checking out a bag of chips, and the guy standing in front of it, thinks my lustful gaze is meant for him."

"So the American people's choices for President of the United States will most likely be Donald Trump or Hilary Clinton. That's it. That's the joke. There is no punchline."

"I'll never forget the first time I had sex That's because I kept the receipt!"

"What's the best vegetable to bring to a party? Stephen Hawking"

"I typed ""married"" but it was auto-corrected to ""martyred"". Damn,smartphone has gained intelligence."