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Joke of the Day

"What would happen if tarantulas were as big as horses ? If one bit you you could ride it to hospital !"

"I couldn't put it off any longer, at the mall to shop for Christmas presents. Christ, what was I thinking... I came here sober."

"What does a drama student do while stuck in math class? She Cos(plays)"

"Q: Why did the girl spray her clock? A: It was full of ticks."

"Been talking to this girl for 10 mins and she hasn't slapped me OR called me ""gross""... Hope she's ok with the names I picked for our kids."

"Who's the most popular guy at a nudist colony? The guy who can carry two cups of coffee and a dozen donuts."

"Why did Adrian Peterson sign with the Minnesota Twins? Because they needed a switch-hitter."

"It turns out the town drunk is an exorcist. Since his last visit, there are no more spirits in the liquor store."

"The secret of a long marriage is accepting the utter euphoria you would feel from strangling your spouse to death isn't worth life in jail."

"What did one tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, They're both stuck up cunts!"