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Joke of the Day

"When I got my first pube, I left it under my pillow and waited for the pube fairy. And he came. All over my pillow."

"Why are oceans called ""The High Seas""? Because of all the seaweed!"

"What part of your computer is most likely to molest your child? The PDF file. What part of your computer is most likely to molest your child? The PDF file."

"I heard that there was no plane be shot down in Constantinople Because there was no Turkey"

"What did Alyssa the duck say to Henry the beaver? Quack quack!"

"Being atheist is like buying a floor model No assembly required."

"If short people smoke weed... If short people smoke weed, do they get high or medium."

"Who do Egyptians pray to when the public transportation breaks down? Anubis (If you don't get it, say it slower.)"

"Mom: You should come camping with us! It's only $100! Me: You want me to pay $100 to sleep outside? Mom: Yeah. Me: I'm getting a new Mom."

"How do you know if your roommate is gay? When his Dick tastes like shit"