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Joke of the Day
"One of my friends told me how electricity is measured And I was like watt?"
Next Joke
"My cat is an artist He drew blood"
"You know what they say, so I won't tell you."
"What happened to the brain eating zombie that went to Washington? He starved to death."
"How do deaf people tell each other secrets ? They wear mittens."
"I hate double standards. If a baby crawls around, it's ""adorable,"" but if I do, I'm ""causing a disturbance"" and ""need to leave""? Whatever."
"If you're going to insist I get you a wedding gift, then I'm going to insist you bail me out when I get caught shoplifting it."
"So I'm not showing up to any Halloween parties this year... I'll be telling everyone I'm Malaysia Airlines Flight 370."
"In answer to the question ""would you have sex with bill Clinton"" 87 percent of Americans responded No. Not again"
"There are only two things certain in life death, taxes, and people who can't count."