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Joke of the Day

"Man at the dog park: Who's a good girl? WHOSAGOODGIRRRRLLL???? Me: *looks around* *slowly raises hand*"

"Nuts What do you call nuts on the wall? Wallnuts. What do you call nuts on your chest? Chest nuts. Finally, what do you call nuts on your chin? A dick in your mouth."

"I'm not dumb, I just have a lot of blonde moments."

"What did Cesar say when the people of Rome wanted to re-empower the Tribune? Oh, Plebes."

"This sushi restaurant has the worst service ever. ""Sir, this is an aquarium."""

"What do you call a kid with no arms or legs. Names."

"Ah, Breast Cancer Awareness Month. If you know you have boobs, go get checked. You too ladies."

"The iPhone 6S+ has been doing really well so far... It seems to be a huge 6S"

"These Alt-Right people should Ctrl+Alt-Right+Delete themselves from American society, Am I right?!"

"[hails Satan] [Satan pulls up in his cab]"