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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear? Lorainna Bobbitt dies in a car accident! She was merging into traffic, and some dick cut her off."

"How many stoners does it take to change a lightbulb? None, the room is already lit."

"If you really want to impress me with the year a bottle of wine was made, bring me one from 2024...."

"Did you hear the one about Hellen Keller? Well neither did she."

"So I got banned from the DIY store. I was just looking for a vibrator."

"Why is Math always sad? Because it has too many problems."

"Why did Hitler kill himself... ... Because he was being charged for the gas bill"

"Right before Abe Lincoln was shot Mary Todd Lincoln: See honey, I told you it wouldn't kill you to take me out sometime."

"Two guys are walking down the street when they see a dog licking his balls. The first guy says, ""Man, I wish I could do that. The second guy says, ""Pet him, maybe he'll let you."""

"TIFU by starting a World War after accidently shooting a British submarine. Oops, wrong sub."