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Joke of the Day

"""See that guy over there? I have to serve him with papers today."" -Oh really? Why? ""Because I lost my tennis racquet."""

"Q: What lottery did the broom win? A: The sweepstakes."

"Men are like soap operas. They're fun to watch but don't believe everything you hear."

"NSA joke I always said President Obama bugged me."

"What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room together? 100 people who don't do dick."

"What's six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild? Money."

"What are the magic words for making a spoiled asparagus edible? Impairagus Repairagus"

"Pretending to hold the elevator while secretly pressing ""close door"" is an art."

"What do you call an unemployed Nazi? Laid-off Hitler!"

"It's gonna be a long day. I can wait to get home and curl up with a good Internet."