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Joke of the Day
"Right now Chuck Norris' pumpkin is carving itself"
Next Joke
"My Asian friend asked me what the word correctible meant... I replied, ""It's what you call an object regarded as being of value or interest to a collector."""
"I really hate being bipolar... ...it's great!"
"Nice try, dogs who wear ""Please Don't Pet Me, I'm Working"" vests."
"What's worse than sucking 12 raw oysters out of your grandma's vagina? Realizing you only put in 11"
"I went to Art Therapy to treat my dyslexia. I don't know why they put me in a maze, but the cheese was good."
"Why did Ayn Rand lose the pool tournament? She wouldn't play on a regulation size table"
"I'm pretty sure I have all of those countless hours spent playing Tetris to thank for my mad dishwasher loading skills."
"Ebola is in Dallas? At least the Dallas Cowboys don't have to worry about it. They can't catch anything."
"I'm writing a movie script about a group of Kenyan refugees who are breaking track records in a suburban American high school... I call it, ""Fast times at Ridgemont High"""