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Joke of the Day

"And now I spend the rest of the day worrying about whether or not I removed the sticker from the apple I just ate."

Next Joke
 
"What do you call a German virgin? Guttentight."
"Kid 1: I'm bored Kid 2: me too Kid 3: our parents gave us horrible names"
"A sociopath walks into a bar The bartender asks, ""What do you feel like having?"" ""Nothing."""
"C, E-flat, and G walk into a bar. The bartender shows them the door and says, ""Sorry, we don't serve minors."""
"What's does America and programming have in common? When you fix one problem, 38 more problems pop up."
"There are two fish in a tank... ...and one says to the other, ""how do we drive this thing?"""
"TIL: To never trust a fart."
"do you ever start rubbing your eyes and then it feels really good and you can't stop so it's like eye masturbation"
"Imagine me naked. Wrong. Fatter."