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Joke of the Day
"How often do I think about Keira? Knightley."
Next Joke
"Ahhhhh A man was taking a crap and the water splashed his butt and he yelled ahhh toilet monster and ran out in the middle of the road butt naked and got run over."
"In retrospect, back in my club days I should have recognized there was a reason the beat always sounded like DOUCHE DOUCHE DOUCHE."
"How many friend-zoned guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They just sit around and compliment it and get pissed when it won't screw."
"Why don't tents have locks. Because black people don't go camping."
"We should stop making jokes out of Harambe Those jokes are dead anyways"
"3-year-old: Can the baby come out to play? Pregnant wife: No, honey. She's not ready yet. 3-year-old: Wife: 3-year-old: Babies are lazy."
"What is born skinless, flies wingless and sings until it dies? A fart. *dedicated to my dear departed Grandfather who told me this joke almost 40 years ago when I was a kid.*"
"Waiter what is this stuff? That's bean salad sir. I know what it's been but what is it now?"
"""BALL SO HARD MUTHAF--KAS WANNA FINE ME."" ""Grandma, just pay the parking ticket..."""