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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't the lesbian go to the bread festival? She already gets two times the normal amount of yeast."

"How do you make a little boy cry twice when your finished wipe your dick on his favourite teddy bear"

"I met a girl with twelve nipples... Sounds funny, dozen tit."

"Checking your phone when someone pulls out their phone is the yawn of our generation."

"What is the difference between an amateur archer and a constipated owl? One shoots but can't hit... The other hoots but can't shit."

"LPT: If someone is stubbornly blocking the isle at the supermarket with their shopping cart THINK before trying to ram them. You might be standing in front of a mirror. :/"

"Two fish were sitting in a tank... One turns to the other and says ""Hey, do you know how to drive this thing?"""

"Titanic II: Jack Survives"

"(NSFW) What did the haddock get covered in at the fish orgy? SALMONal fluid"

"Forgot to turn on the oven. Food's been in there for 45mins. I know, cause I set the timer."