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Joke of the Day

"How do you see fish semen? You Blow-Fish!"

"Why are women like parachutes? Because if they don't spread they are worthless."

"Why are knives always the funniest students at utensil school? Because they're the class cut-ups."

"A millimeter, a centimeter, and an inch jump into a pool but none of them know how to swim"

"I really have to hand it to short people Because they usually can't reach it anyways."

"Went in for a tonsillectomy. Surgeon did a frontal lobectomy instead. I complained... ... really gave 'em a piece of my mind!"

"Isn't it so awkward when you misplace a Rolex? It's like, do I want to tell people that there's a free Rolex on the loose? Relatable, right?"

"What's the difference between a women's argument and a knife? The knife has a point !"

"I actually heard this joke in a dream this morning What do you call a little square that hasn't developed its new dimension yet? Precubescent"

"What's the difference between me and a calendar? You can't fuck the shit out of a calendar"