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Joke of the Day

"a gymnast walks into a bar. she is immediately given a 0.0 and disqualified from Olympic trials. you're supposed to jump OVER the bar, idiot"

Next Joke
 
"What did one lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog? Hey! We really DO taste like chicken!"
"So Jared Fogle was actually reported to have been spotted at a local Macy's. He heard Boys pant were half off."
"God is pretty creative. I mean, look at me."
"A man walked into a bar He is an alcoholic and he is ruining his family. (Any anti joke lovers out there?)"
"Survival Tip: When flipping off your wife behind her back... Make sure she's not standing in front of a mirror."
"What do your mom and a hockey team have in common? They both go three periods without a shower."
"""Sir, I need you to explain your resume."" Well, my pet tiger & I were beloved cartoon characters ""Current job?"" I pee on things I don't like"
"At the police station a) Somebody stole my wallet. b) When did this happen ? a) I don't know he also stole my watch."
"Think most people would be both disappointed and relieved if they realized just how little other people care what they do."