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Joke of the Day

"*uses Mr. Clean magic eraser to wipe off your drawn on eyebrows*"

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"How many I.T. guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? none. That's a hardware problem but have you tried turning it on and off again?"
"How did the man get the woman into the pool club? He snooker in!"
"Did you know there are more planes in the ocean.. Than submarines in the sky?"
"what do jeb bush and lance arm strong have in common? everyone was disappointed with their last speeches and no one was disappointed when they dropped out of the race"
"What's the best part of two lesbians marrying? Two cooks in the house."
"What's another name for floor pie? 3."
"How do you make a chocolate omelette? With Easter Eggs!"
"Yesterday, I got food poisoning I don't know when I'll use it"
"What's the final product Steve Jobs released? The iDied"