82814

Joke of the Day

"Don't judge me. Judge Judy."

"Where are all the women in amateur astronomy? At the other end of the telescope."

"What did the cannibal say to his victim before they went for a long walk? You're gonna be pooped after this."

"There's no ""u"" in awesome... But there's always ""me""."

"I don't talk about my ex's because I like to start of with a clean slate. That, and they're dead to me. Well, to everyone, but mostly me."

"What do you call a man who can't stand? Neal"

"If I was Snow White you'd never be able to kill me with an apple...you'd have to poison an eclair or something..."

"My parents would hide fruit roll ups on top of the refrigerator where I couldn't reach them. And leave chemicals under the sink."

"My grandfather died during sex. I still cry when I watch the video."

"What did M. Night Shyamalan say about a duck's penis? What a twist."