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Joke of the Day

"Hey baby..are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids in you"

"What does Santa and his elves listen to in their Christmas workshop? WRAP MUSIC!"

"David Hasselhoff calls his Agent and demands, ""I want everyone to call me The Hoff from now on."" His Agent says, ""Sure. No hassle."""

"whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza gets out of the oven."

"Clones are people two."

"Give me my Money!! How do you make a Hormone-- Don't pay her!"

"What do you feel when you accidentally run over and kill a group of geese crossing the road? Goosebumps"

"Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks? Just taught my 15 year old German Shepard to play dead! Cocky bastard is trying to set a record too! Been that way for eight hours now..."

"What's grey and comes in litres? An elephant. Apologies if this is a repost - heard it yesterday and had to share."

"What can conspiracy theorists never explain? They say that 9/11 was an inside job... but planes fly OUTSIDE. Can't explain that"