81950

Joke of the Day

"Birdie birdie in the sky dropped a poopy in my eye I didn't cry I didn't sigh I thank god cows can't fly"

"FREEBIRD! (When you purchase a bird of equal or lesser value.)"

"What do you call someone who is great at casting?? A Mastercaster hahahahahah"

"*draws a line in the sand* *looks at the line in the sand* *decides that it might be time to vacuum*"

"What's Sting's favorite Olympic sport? The long hump"

"Don't you hate when someone has a great tweet idea, but they TOTALLY fuck up the wording, and it's you?"

"Why was Freddie Mercury a great front-man for Queen? He could perform ""Under Pressure""."

"Be careful when you're watching a movie with your wife. You're gonna get blamed for whatever the guy in the movie does."

"Doggy Diet book Did you hear about the new doggy diet book? It is titled ""Shitzu shouldn't eat"""

"Why is Santa Clause always so Jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live."