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Joke of the Day

"What did the viola say to her daughter before crossing the street? You better C^ or you'll B^"

"Why do Canadians not pay attention to their local wildlife? Because there's nothing to care-aboot. (caribou)"

"Mary had a little lamb And a side of mashed potatoes"

"I got hit by a truck with a camouflage paint job. It came out of nowhere."

"I'm not a lucky man I once gambled on a couch and won a baby"

"Time for a police based knock knock joke. PEW PEW PEW it's the police, OPEN THE DOOR!"

"Interviewer: Your resume only has ""Mad"" under ""Skills"" Me: Yeah boyee Interviewer: *tears up* You're just what we need. Welcome to Subway."

"Why did the 2 stem cell researchers get a divorce? Because they grew a part."

"Socialism Q. Why did the dyslexic escapologist join the International Socialists? A. because he wanted to help untie the human race."

"Where does Santa stash his money? In a snowbank."