80141

Joke of the Day

"How did the pedophile pianist get caught? He accidentally let people hear him playing in D-minor."

"What do you call a Shi Tzu giving a blowjob? Shit Head."

"Can Feburary March? No. But April May"

"I didn't go through four years of grad school for this! (I didn't go to grad school.)"

"I started a food-themed 80's cover band called Durian Durian... ...but we broke up after everybody told us how much we stank."

"I didn't believe women were getting their assholes bleached Then my sisters boyfriend took his hat off..."

"I worry that people who say ""I'll sleep when I'm dead"" may have missed a Science class or two."

"I'm already visualising the duct tape across your mouth."

"I always have a suicide note in my shower so that i wont look stupid if i ever slip and crack my head"

"The buildup of carbon emissions in the atmosphere is a great icebreaker."