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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the latest Calvin Klein Lawsuit? Yeah - but it wasn't much of a suit. It was actually a brief case."

"I have the best blanket in the world It's the sheet."

"What animals were last to leave the ark ? The elephants as they had to pack their trunks !"

"Put the punchline in the title. How do you ruin a joke?"

"Every morning when my alarm goes off I think ""This is the worst thing that has EVER happened."""

"Why do witches laugh when they ride their brooms? because they're not wearing any panties."

"If Norman Bates was batman's dad.. would Alfred call Bruce, Master Bates?"

"Did you hear about the woman who only had two chances to get pregnant? She blew them both."

"What do you say to a kid if they give you a picture? That's pretty shit mate. My 20 year old cousin who has no arms can draw better than you. You have no talent, deal with it."

"Now boarding... Two vultures board an airplane each is carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, ""I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger."""