79597
Joke of the Day
"I like my wine how I like my women 15 years old and locked in a basement"
Next Joke
"One wrong choice in a Nancy Drew Choose Your Own Aventure book and you're wearing a human intestine as a scarf in post-apocalyptic Boise."
"If familiarity breeds contempt and absence makes the heart grow fonder, then by definition marriage is a terrible idea."
"Wife: I told you to baby proof the house! Me: I did. That baby has no chance if it comes in here. The bear traps will make sure of that."
"Why couldn't the bicycle stand on its own? It was two-tired"
"Where do sharks come from? Sharkago!"
"Why is it impossible to run through a campground? You can only ran, because it's past tents."
"I got kicked out of my club cuddling team today.. ..turns out they frown on the use of performance enhancing hugs."
"I kept hitting my fingers while trying to nail a sign to my wall... So I said, ""Screw it!"""
"What's the difference between a Baby Hobbit and Taco Bell? One throws shire fits, and the other gives you fire shits."