78558

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea??? I wouldn't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face."

"What kind of ghosts haunt operating theatres? Surgical spirits."

"What is the main material used in the manufacture of TIE fighters? TIE tanium"

"[Couples counseling] ""It's not good to keep these things bottles up, you know"" Okay, fine *opens jar of wasps*"

"What did the casket say to the sick casket? Are you coffin?"

"If you don't have any feelings watching a kid cry, most likely it's your kid."

"God must be a woman Because just like my wife, she's always right"

"Never fall in love with a tennis player. Love means nothing to them."

"What do you call an EDM party full of serial killers at the bottom of the ocean? Deep-rave."

"How many black people do you need to start a riot? Negative 1."