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Joke of the Day

"Her: *leaving seductively, slowly dragging fingertip across countertop* Mgr: What'd she want? Me: nothing. Mgr: Where're all the donuts?"

"""guns don't kill people, guns CREATE people!"" *fires 10 newborn babies out of a bazooka*"

"I like to stand near people on gluten-free diets and eat as much gluten as I can and say things like ""Mmmm, sweet gluten."""

"Why did the baker have brown hands? He kneaded a pooh"

"How does a man on a moon get his haircut? Eclipse it."

"What disease do horses fear most? Hay Fever!"

"My wife reckons that recently I have become an awkward, arrogant cunt, and she just can't understand me. Seems like my French classes are going really well."

"Q: Why was the firewood punished? A: It was knotty."

"What's 18 inches long and hangs in front of an asshole? Donald Trump's tie"

"Non english speakers, translate the best joke you have from your language. Other redditors will have to guess from what country the joke is. Obviously, names and places will have to be translated too."