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Joke of the Day

"What did the poles do during world war two? They held the telephone wires off the ground."

"You ever been to the butcher with the chastity fetish? Say what you will about the lifestyle, but his meat simply can't be beat."

"MAFIA BOSS (ominously): Take him out ME: What if he's already seeing someone MAFIA BOSS: Well then you have to respect that relationship"

"Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop? He called it ""Ham Hocks""."

"Time to get in my wheel box to go to my work box so I can pay for my home box until I'm ready for my death box."

"Half of my life has been spent hoping people don't see me."

"*Flips over cards* It was your TC in the KIK room with the retweeter."

"Is your phone in your back pocket? Because that ass is calling me!"

"Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand? She moans with the other."

"What's the difference... ...between a piano, a fish, and glue? You can tune a piano but you can't tuna fish ""What about the glue?"" I knew you'd get stuck on that."