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Joke of the Day

"(I get an amber alert for a missing child) OK its my time to shine (I get in my car and back out without looking and instantly hit the kid)"

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"What is a java programmers favorite bird? A BlueJ"
"My friend is so rich He thought Manual labor was a Spanish musician"
"What did the penis say to the asshole in the morning? This bowl ain't big enough for the both of us."
"How do you know Jesus is okay with gays? Because he had two dads"
"Attention friends who don't understand humor,,, please do not attempt to reply to the posts of us who have humorous whit,,,, it's beyond your skill level."
"So I'm trying to get my husband to go to Paris with me but so far my best argument has been, ""I will kill you in your sleep."""
"""You're under arrest for trespassing."" ""On what grounds?"" -FromJokester4Android"
"What did the sushi say to the bee? Wassabee?!?!"
"I had a three way the other night.... Had a couple no shows, but I still had a good time."